Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Thumper, Mar 3, 2008.
A: Cause Mr Wipple will kick your ***.
Q: Why is Mr Wipple such a dick?
A: Because Mrs. Whipple is banging the milkman.
Q: How does one know when buttermilk goes bad?
A: You would be too if all you had was toilet paper to squeeze.
Q: What is the speed of smell?
A: Now that's a stupid question.
Q: How come when kids are finally grown up and have left the home they cost you more money than ever?
A: Because they think they're entitled to be 16 forever, and they live to suck their parents dry.
Oh, wait a minute, that's just MY kids..........
Q: Why does the government take away the tax breaks for kids at age 17, when they start to get REALLY expensive?!
The speed of smell is inversely proportionate to its pleasantness; e.g., the sweet essence of a rose takes several seconds to fully reach the olfactory center in the brain, while the baby's after-lunch diaper hits you like a Mack truck going 100 MPH!!!
A: Because they want things to be painful. Then in their capaign for president they can say they feel our pain.
Q: Do we help our kids outta love or fear they will put us in a nursing home if we don't?
sometime next week
who's authority were we suppose to question??
A: All but this
Q: When did they bring back Kenny from the dead?
Q: Why are black and white considered values and not colors?
A: As long as you're willing to eat your mistakes.
Q: What the hell is water based oil paint?
A: Isn't that when you put down a coat of water on your base guitar then paint it with oil? :icon_huh:
Q: Who is Mrs. Robinson?
A: Mr. Robinson's wife.
Q: Who is Mr. Robinson?
A: Joe Dimaggio's mistress that made him go away...
Q: Cats get furballs - what do catfish get?
A: A date with my skillet
Q: How do you mend a broken heart?
A: With a scalpel and rib spreaders
Q: Where do all the missing socks go?
A: to a parallel sock -based universe.
Q: why does my car run better when it's clean?
A: Because it knows it's gonna make it rain
Q: Don't you run better when clean?
A: Like a clean machine.
Q: How can kites fly without wings?
A: They are made of anti-gravity materials.
Q: How does something come up missing?
A: By reaching the surface while it's still dark outside...
Q: How do you wear a FogHat?:icon_huh:
A: 18 bong hits before taking the slow ride to the show
Q: Is tomorrow today's yesterday?
A: Only on the first full moon Friday of a leap year.
Q: How do you get the sweet nectar out of tulips?
A: You have to bee careful
Q: So you find grubs attractive?
A: Yes, and tape worms too.
Q: Just what are you cutting, when you cut one?
A.The cheese..........what else?
Q. Why do they call them apartments when they're all stuck together?
A: Because the word 'prison' was already taken.
Q: What is the definition of 'is'?:icon_huh:
Separate names with a comma.