Quotes on the day.

:icon_rofl:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep... not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

The birds are talking to me, thought Caw.

I'm not who you think I am... I am... I AM

GOD

I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis. -Humphrey Bogart's last words

I wonder how many years of college down the drain that was. :hilarious:

"You're just a bunch of Jack Happy Bobble Heads with beady little eyes!"
~B4L

"I have a stronger arm than John, hands down." Jay Cutler

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy" Benjamin Franklin

I'm not as think as you drunk I am

"Heaven doesn't want me... Hell's afraid... I'm taking over!!!"

"Liberals are funny!"
~BDH

"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they always worked for me!"

"I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel."

"Let's see who, we can Fuk with next."

This one is worth repeating...

"But atleast I can spell Kindergarden."
~LV Bolt Fan

http://www.bolttalk.net/forums/showthread.php?t=17428&page=21



BEST EVER!!! :yes:
How many years of college down the drain was that?!!! :hilarious: :hilarious: :hilarious:

"It's kind of fun to do the impossible."
~Walt Disney

"It depends on what the meaning of the word 'is' is."

Win if you can, lose if you must, but at all times....Cheat!
"Classy" Fred Blasie.

fixed it for you.

Bilicheat stole it from Blasie. :yes:
:icon_tease:

Sometimes you just gotta say...What the Fu*k !

"If you ever see me getting beaten up by the police, put the video camera down and help me."

I dont know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you, half as well as you deserve. ~ Bilbo Baggins

To do is to be ~ Descartes



To be is to do ~ Voltaire



Do be do be do ~Frank Sinatra

Sorry this isn't a one-liner, but one of my favorites from Two and a half Men:

Charlie: Alan, there comes a time in every man’s life when he has to make a choice; does he want to be loved, or does he want to get laid. Fourteen years ago you made the wrong choice. You got married, and you wound up with neither. But now, fate has given you another chance. Welcome it. Embrace it. Grab it's pert little ***.
Alan: What am I supposed to do, walk into my son’s birthday and say "Hey everybody, look at this gorgeous twenty-two year old woman I'm having sex with."
Charlie: Oh don't be silly. You don't want to rub their faces in it, you just want them to know where yours has been.

"The draft is in the air, yes. But it’s 61 days away, and when you get the coaches and general managers together in one place, as they were this weekend here at the Arctic Circle, you can just tell they’re in first grade in 2009 Draftology 101."

- Peter King, the fat tub of goo, this morning.

"Borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect it back."

"Can I borrow some money?" - me