Pennsylvania man accidentally fires cannonball into neighbor’s home UNIONTOWN, Pa. - A Pennsylvania Civil War buff faces a felony charge for accidentally firing a 2-pound cannonball through the wall of his neighbor's home. William Maser, 54, had been charged with reckless endangerment, criminal mischief and disorderly conduct. Authorities on Thursday added a felony count of discharging a firearm into an occupied structure. Also Thursday, Maser waived his right to a preliminary hearing on all the charges. Maser has acknowledged firing a homemade cannon outside his house in Georges Township, about 40 miles southeast of Pittsburgh, in early September. The cannonball, about two inches in diameter, ricocheted and hit the neighbor's home about 400 yards away, smashing through a window and a wall before landing in a closet. Nobody was hurt. police said.
68 is a bit old to become a cowboy - but I'm sure that old fart would fit right in on a cattle drive!
Hay some of my posts are gone :icon_huh: where did they go... :icon_shrug: I want post count credit... :lol: :icon_tease:
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?" Bud looks at the man, obviously yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?" The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany . Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC-connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud. "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" "No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter you are than me; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep... Now give me back my dog.
Your posts are in the crazy person section and are still fully reflected on your post count. If you are unable to access that forum go to your User CP and select "Group Memberships." We'll get you right in. :yes:
Another political statement: A man and a woman who had never met before, but who were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a trans-continental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the lower. At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, “Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold.” “I have a better idea,” she replied “Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married.” 'Wow!. That's a great idea!” he exclaimed. “Good,” she replied. “Get your own damn blanket.” After a moment of silence, he farted. The End
or we can all go out and drink some nice ice cold beer, and talk bad about everyone who doesnt show up to help us drink some nice ice cold beer, with pizza, peanuts, pretzels and popcorn.
An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years.. He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple, and peach trees. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, 'we're not coming out until you leave!' The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked.' Holding the bucket up he said, 'I'm here to feed the alligator.' Some old men can still think fast.
Ugh, stayed home sick today. Aches and pains, stuffed head. I hope I didnt catch the flu that is running rampant around the school district.
