You have reached the City of Oakland’s Suicide Prevention Hotline, due to recent tragic events we have been FORCED to change our menu options to help speed up your call, PLEASE listen closely. For Raider fans please dial ZERO
Attention Raider fan, there is nothing we can do to help you. Do the world a favor and impale yourself with the nearest available aluminum foil covered cardboard spike. Better luck in the next life.*click*