Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by BFISA, Mar 17, 2008.
Thought for today-
When your gecko is broken you have a reptile dysfunction.
:wave:Hi KP hope all is good with you...
Are you ready for some football... :football:
Thursday Night Football
hey JL :wave:
Top Ten Country Western Songs in 2008:
10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine
9. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With an Ugly Woman But I Woke Up With a Few
8. If The Phone Don't Ring, It's Me Callin'
7. I Have Missed You, But My Aim's Gettin' Better
6. Can't Take Her To A Dogfight 'Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win
5. I'm So Miserable Without Ya- It's Like You're Still Here
4. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Miss Him
3. She Took My Ring and Gave Me the Finger
2. She's Lookin' Better After Every Beer
And the Number One Country/Western song :
It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chewed Your *** All Day
Out of rep again...
All Repped Out!!
Guys, I have I.E. and I need some assistance. I want to know how to block a website so it keeps me away....... I need it to be out of sight, out of mind....
Thanks... The first person with the correct answer gets $1K Bolt Cash... :icon_banana:
Hay, Johnny... No problem... I figured it out... Just had to figure out how to stop blocking sites that were unrated as well. Anyway, it's all good now.
TGIF.... I'm going out for Sushi tonight. :icon_banana: :icon_banana: :icon_banana:
I'm going to have some sushi and then some sushi. :icon_tease:
Have fun tonight... :icon_toast:
Why I am a "DOG person"....
How to Give Your Cat a Pill
1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill in mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.
6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paw. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door on to neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessertspoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.
13. Tie the little devil's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.
14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.
15. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.
How to Give a Dog a Pill
1. Wrap it in bacon.
2. Toss it in the air.
Hey Buck, you stayin dry?? :icon_eek:
Happy Saturday! (slurp)
Toby, you're next repper will turn you 1000...:icon_party: I hope it can be me but I don't have any ammo until later this afternoon..
Thank god for ESPN- i can watch College football:yes::yes:
Watching an ACC matchup Georgia Tech @ BC
Mornin' hoes... I'm off to Starbucks to get some kind of skinny latte or whatever they have...
Alina is going to her uncle's wedding today and Granny Carrie bought her the cutest, I mean cutest dress... God she's spoiled... :yes:
Hi Chris. :wave:
how are you doing?
Did you enjoy your sushi?
All Repped Out
Sushi nights are my favs.
We went to a great place that's about a mile from my home. I know people that drive 50 miles to go to this particular place.
However, it's changed owners and IMNSHO, the quality has gone down. Kind of disappointing.
Just a quick HI and BYE.. gotta run.
watching any CFB?
Do you believe it??? It's Opening Day Eve!!!
Let's Go BOLTS!!!
Sushi has that effect on me too! :lol:
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