Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by BFISA, Mar 17, 2008.
Ah **** It Too Many Of Y'all To Name...
Anyway....What The Hell Is The Blue Rep???? I'm Familiar With The Red And Green But Blue??????
:lol: Blue Rep? Sure hope it's not in anyway connected with Blue Christmas. Are you saying that the rep box is blue, rather than red or green?
I've gotten an infraction before, yellow box... but no blue boxes... :icon_shrug:
I work from 1-9 tomorrow... and then I'm off until 1/6/09... :icon_party: Of course there will be a tiny bit of paperwork to catch up on... but I'll be vacationing for the most part.
That is great news Carrie!
Sorry for the late piling on here, I hope she pulls through this with no other problems!
Yup...A Blue Rep Box....Bugs The Hell Outta Me When I Look At It..
Only 7 more days !!!
HOLIDAY EATING TIPS
1.Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That' s the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand-alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A GREAT NEW YEAR!
Simba, who sent it to you????? Do you know how to do a screen shot?
A bit gross, but still humorous...
Thought y'all should read this in case you're thinking of installing an electric fence!
We have the standard 6ft. fence in the backyard, and a few months ago, I heard about burglaries increasing dramatically in the entire city.
To make sure this never happened to me, I got an electric fence and ran a single wire along the top of the fence. Actually, I got the biggest cattle charger Tractor Supply had, made for 26 miles of fence.
I then used an 8 ft. long ground round, drove 7.5 feet into the ground. The ground rod is the key, with the more you have in the ground, the better the fence works.
One day I'm mowing the back yard with my cheapo Walmart 6hp bigwheel pushmower. The hot wire is broken and laying out in the yard. I knew for a fact that I unplugged the charger. I pushed the mower around the wire and reached down to grab it, to throw it out of the way. It seems as though I hadn't
remembered to unplug it after all.
Now I'm standing there, I've got the running lawnmower in my right hand and the 1.7 gigavolt fencewire in the other hand. Keep in mind the charger is about the size of a marine battery and has a picture of an upside down cow on fire on the cover. Time stood still. The first thing I notice is my balls trying to climb up the front side of my body. My ears curled downwards and I could feel the lawnmower ignition firing in the backside of my brain.. Every time that Briggs & Stratton rolled over, I could feel the spark in my head. I was literally at one with the engine.
It seems as though the fence charger and the POS lawnmower were fighting over who would control my electrical impulses.
Science says you cannot crap, pee, and come at the same time. I beg to differ. Not only did I do all three at once, but my bowels emptied 3 different times in less than half of a second. It was a Matrix kind of bowel movement, where time is creeping along and you're all leaned back and BAM BAM BAM you just crap your pants 3 times. It seemed like there were minutes in between but in reality it was so close together it was like exhaust pulses from a big block Chevy turning 8 grand.
At this point I'm about 30 minutes (maybe 2 seconds) into holding onto the fence wire. My hand is wrapped around the wire palm down so I can't let go. I grew up on a farm so I know all about electric fences... but Dad always had those POS chargers made by International or whoever that were like 9 volts and just kinda tickled. This I could not let go of. The 8 foot long ground rod is now accepting signals from me through the permadamp Ark-La-Tex river bottom soil. At this point I'm thinking I'm going to have to just man up and take it, until the lawnmower runs out of gas.
'Damn!,' I think, as I remember I just filled the tank!
Now the lawnmower is starting to run rough. It has settled into a loping run pattern as if it had some kind of big lawnmower race cam in it. Covered in poop, pee, jizz, and with my balls on my chest I think 'Oh God, please die... pleeeeze die'. But nooooo, it settles into the rough lumpy cam idle nicely and remains there, like a big bore roller cam EFI motor waiting for the go command from its owner's right foot.
So here I am in the middle of July, 104 degrees, 80% humidity, standing in my own backyard, begging God to kill me. God did not take me that day... he left me there covered in my own fluids to writhe in the misery my own stupidity had created...
I honestly don't know how I got loose from the wire.... I woke up laying on the ground hours later. The lawnmower was beside me, out of gas. It was later on in the day and I was sunburned. There were two large dead grass spots where I had been standing, and then another long skinny dead spot were the wire had layed while I was on the ground still holding on to it. I assume I finally had a seizure and in the resulting thrashing had somehow let go of the wire. Upon waking from my electrically induced sleep I realized a few things.
1- Three of my teeth seem to have melted.
2- I now have cramps in the bottoms of my feet and my right butt cheek (not the left, just the right).
3- Poop, pee, and semen when all mixed together, do not smell as bad as you might think.
4- My left eye will not open.
5- My right eye will not close.
6- The lawnmower runs like a sumna***** now. Seriously! I think our little session cleared out some carbon fouling or something, because it was better than new after that.
7- My balls are still smaller than average yet they are almost a foot long
8- I can turn on the TV in the gameroom by farting while thinking of the number 4 (still dont understand this?)
That day changed my life. I now have a newfound respect for things. I appreciate the little things more, and now I always triple check to make sure the fence is unplugged before I mow.
The good news, is that if a burglar does try to come over the fence, I can clearly visualize what my security system will do to him, and THAT gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling all over, which also reminds me to triple check before I mow.
"The happiest people don't have the best of everything... they make the best of what they have"
I want to know what it means :icon_huh:
OMG!!! :icon_rofl: :icon_rofl: :icon_rofl:
I just shot milk about 3 feet outta my nose!!! :icon_rofl:
Hey Carrie, I hope your niece is doing well and on the way to recovery. Also, here's to hoping you had a great birthday.:icon_toast:
Everyone ready for Christmas? Im not. Well, almost.
I'm very close to being done.
What gift are you most excited to give this year?
A boring, but useful, ice maker for my sis and her husband.
I am sure you have soemthing that can top that.:yes:
I'm done buying the gifts. Now I need to muster up the energry to wrap them... :icon_shrug:
I'll send ya some wrapping rep as soon as I can. :yes:
It Was "Cool Arrow" That Gave it To Me...I Dont Have A Screenshot Program But I Can PM You My Password And Let You See For Yourself....Screenshot It If Possible...
What operating system is on your computer?
Edited: If it is windows - did you know you can use your keyboard's PrtSc (Print Screen) button as follows:
Copy the window or screen contents -
To make a copy of the active window, press ALT+PRINT SCREEN.
To copy the entire screen as it appears on your monitor, press PRINT SCREEN.
To paste the image into a document, click the Edit menu in the document window, and then click Paste - or you can do the same thing in the windows "Paint" program and save it as a JPG.
(Hope this helps - -=dave=-)...
Blue rep, means that the person has either turned off their rep score or does not have enough rep power to have a rep score yet.
If I Fedex'd ya mine, could you get them back to me in time?
I'll send back the ones I don't want. :icon_tease:
I only wrapped the presents for the little kids... Everyone else got a gift card in a fancy lil box or I threw the gift in a christmas gift bag lined with tissue paper.
Testing to see if my new signature line works.
How you doin?
Separate names with a comma.